As if family dynamics aren’t complicated enough, now I’m faced with the added “I’m no longer listening to you cuz you have no idea what you’re talking about, so I’m going to listen to your parents cuz they ‘obviously’ got it right the first time”, it makes it that much harder to actually parent your own children.
Why is it when problems arise with your children and you choose on a set discipline there are certain people who find it necessary to go behind you and do what they want with your child even though you have told them not to?
My oldest is graduating this year. She is having HUGE issues with doing what she’s told. It didn’t matter if it’s from myself, my husband or her father, she won’t do it.
How hard is it to just clean your room, load the dish washer, do your homework and help with your siblings? Apparently very.
We had an agreement about her phone, she got one, I paid for it and I had the passcodeto it. Along with that went the agreement that I could, at any time, take the phone and go through it.
Now I know there are going to be those who believe that is wrong and that I should let her have her privacy, and to you I say this, she is MY kids and I will do what I have to, to keep her safe. If that means taking get phone and going through it or going through her Facebook account, then that’s what I will do.
Speaking of her phone, I found some texts and pics that I still think were inappropriate for a young lady to read or see. After finding them I starred to flip out. I went into her room and yelled and screamed at her. I wanted to throttle her, lock her in her room and never let her out, but I didn’t. By the time I was done yelling at her my head hurt and I couldn’t see straight or think about anything else.
I thought I had taught her better. I thought she knew better. I believe her when she said that she was not doing anything bad. I had never distrusted her before. She had never given me a reason to not trust her. Now, I am starting to feel like I have failed her.
So because of these texts and pics, that I wasn’t supposed to see, my daughter has stopped talking to me. She doesn’t call, come over or text any more. She wants to be an adult and make adult decisions but she doesn’t want the adult consequences that go with them.
I know that in today’s world, kids are expected to grow up way too fast. As parents it is our job to make sure that they have a childhood, that they don’t become adults when they should still be playing with their dolls and video games.
So at the moment we are at a point where we don’t talk, text, call or see each other. My family on the other hand, has done everything possible to our a wedge between her and I. My mother had a way of turning things around and pitting everyone against each other. Which she has done very well lately. But that’s a topic for a current post.